Rachmaninoff suffered bouts of abysmal depression and was haunted with feelings of insecurity. Often he thought his music was just junk. He was so busy trying to be a conductor, pianist and composer and teacher all at once: No wonder he felt inadequate- he was trying to fill a large order. OK, so I am not a conductor (yet,) but I can only say, knowing a tiny bit about the other occupations, I’d say if he also were trying to be a homeschool mom/home-keeper/piano mom for a week, surely he would have whistled his way to work thereafter. (Bet he didn’t bake, either.)
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